


So give me hope in the darkness that I will see the light

by HistoriaGloria



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Dealing with the aftermath of Mr Ceiling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Set around the beginning of season 2, honestly very self-indulgent, soft and sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:20:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22470013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HistoriaGloria/pseuds/HistoriaGloria
Summary: '“We're just trying to help. We're just people. What matters is that we don't give up. We don't let the mistakes be all we are. We don’t let the mistake be the only thing that we contribute to this world.” Hamid can feel the tears in his eyes, but he can't stop talking, can't stop hoping that he'll somehow help Zolf to see the light.'In the aftermath of Mr Ceiling, Zolf and Hamid have a moment of peace.
Relationships: Hamid Saleh Haroun al-Tahan/Zolf Smith
Comments: 4
Kudos: 34





	So give me hope in the darkness that I will see the light

**Author's Note:**

> Okay right I still love these boys. I'm now up to the beginning of season 3 but you cannot prevent me from loving Zolf.  
> So, this is self-indulgent and cutesy, but they need it!  
> Thanks to Kristsune for putting up with my yelling!
> 
> Title is from Ghosts That We Knew by Mumford and Sons,  
> 'So give me hope in the darkness that I will see the light  
> Cause oh they gave me such a fright  
> But I will hold as long as you like  
> Just promise me we'll be alright.'

The sound of shattering glass is never a positive thing to wake up to.

Hamid jolts upright, having cried himself to sleep sat outside Zolf's room. He tests the handle, finding it open before hurrying inside.

There, he sees Zolf. The cleric is breathing heavily, furious tears in his eyes and the glass window is shattered.

“Zolf...” he says quietly but the dwarf just turns away from him, his face set in a sharp scowl. He hears Sasha come in behind him but it’s clear that he doesn't want to talk to either of them. Sasha barely makes an attempt to talk to him which Zolf shuts down immediately.

Hamid is more stubborn. After Sasha leaves, Hamid moves to sit beside Zolf, quietly in the chair.

“Go away, Hamid,” the cleric says, pulling the duvet over his head as though that could hide him.

“No, think I'll stay here. Besides, I never told you why I became an adventurer...”

Hamid speaks and speaks and speaks. It's something he's good at, he always has been. Zolf listens for the most part, but Hamid knows that he probably not getting through to him.

“We're just trying to help. We're just people. What matters is that we don't give up. We don't let the mistakes be all we are. We don’t let the mistake be the only thing that we contribute to this world.” Hamid can feel the tears in his eyes, but he can't stop talking, can't stop hoping that he'll somehow help Zolf to see the light.

“Are you done?” is all that he says.

It's not a complete rejection, not an instruction for him to leave, just... exhaustion. And honestly, Hamid can't blame him. Zolf has been through so much recently. They all have, with the fallout of Mister Ceiling. But at least Hamid only came out of it with exhaustion and the knowledge he was doing right in the long run. Zolf came out of it with no legs and an immense amount of crushing guilt.

Hamid sighs quietly and leaves, at least for a little while. His attempts to quell the riots and anger on the streets of Paris go fairly poorly. He's no fighter like Bertie, nor does he have the local knowledge and charm of Sasha. Honestly, he's just not the right person for the job.

Disheartened and wet through, he returns to the hotel, to Zolf's room. It's dark, quiet and honestly, Hamid realises as he enters that Zolf has fallen back asleep. The sorcerer gives a smile, weak and tired as he moves to sit in the chair beside the bed.

Somehow, Zolf looks more tense whilst sleeping, his brow furrowed and mouth tight. His left hand lies atop his covers, fingers curled tightly into the sheets.

Hamid pauses.

He wants to help so much, but also there is a personal motive.

Zolf is attractive. Hamid hasn’t really been interested in something as trivial as romance since he has been busy with everything on this quest, but honestly, the dwarf surprised him. No matter the gruff, offensive outer layer he puts on, Hamid knows that Zolf cares deeply about all of them. Well, maybe not so much Bertie. Zolf is, beneath everything, kind and hardy and trust-worthy in a way that Hamid can’t help but be drawn to.

Zolf twists in his sleep, shuffling, his face scrunching up. Hamid reaches out, placing his hand gently on Zolf’s, curling his fingers over the dwarf’s. Twitching and twisting, he continues to clearly have some kind of nightmare.

“Zolf?” Hamid murmurs but there is no response. He just grips his hand gently, not wanting to wake him but also not wanting him to suffer.

Silence.

The halfling sighs softly, leaning his head down beside Zolf’s. He’s exhausted, both physically and emotionally after everything his has happened. And, clinging to the cleric’s hand, he falls straight asleep.

* * *

Hamid wakes suddenly in the night; his dreams are disturbed and dark, filled with the hangover of Mister Ceiling. He presses his free hand to his chest, trying to inhale and exhale as he feels the panic welling up in his chest. It takes him a few moments to calm down, not wanting to cry out and disturb Zolf beside him.

He stares at him for a few moments, quietly when he realises that their hands are still intertwined. Zolf is clinging to his hand, a grip which is so tight that it is cutting off a little of the feeling in Hamid’s fingers. Hamid watches the cleric for a few moments. He still doesn’t look happy, brow furrowed even in sleep.

“Oh, Zolf,” he whispers, leaning down to press his forehead against Zolf’s. But honestly, the halfling doesn’t have anything to say, doesn’t know what to do.

He just wants it all to be okay.

He wants Sasha to be safe and happy. He wants Bertie not to get himself killed. He wants Zolf to be able to forgive himself for what they did.

But there is no magic in the world that he knows that can fix this mess.

Head dropped, he rubs his fingers over Zolf’s hand, almost trying to soothe himself more than the cleric to be honest. Sniffling, he uses his free hand to wipe his eyes again.

“I wish… I wish this had never happened,” Hamid whispers. “I wish everything with Mister Ceiling had never happened. I’m glad I met you. It made terrible things seem better. But I wish this… I wish everything hadn’t happened.” He’s crying, silently. “I’m sorry it did.”

Outside, the dawn is beginning to break. Weak rays of morning sunlight fall over Hamid’s face as he stares over Zolf.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Hamid whispers, pressing his lips gently to Zolf’s forehead.

“I’m glad you’re here too,” comes a reply, so quiet that Hamid almost misses it. But Zolf is awake, staring up at Hamid with soft eyes. The halfling jolts, blinking sheepishly.

“How long have you been awake?” he asks his voice pitching in surprise.

“Just long enough to hear what you said,” Zolf replies, gruffly. The cleric isn’t looking directly at him, shy and awkward in this situation, which does not surprise Hamid.

“Oh,” Hamid says quietly, looking down.

Zolf hasn’t let go of his hand.

“I wish it hadn’t happened too,” Zolf continues, sotto voce. “I wish that a lot of things hadn’t happened. But they did and terrible things came from it. And we have to deal with that.”

“I’m sorry,” the halfling tries but he is waved away.

“No, it’s fine. Just… I’m struggling a little here.” Hamid nods and leans over to wrap Zolf up in an awkward hug. The cleric pats his back, sighing a little.

“We’re going to fix it,” Hamid says firmly, into Zolf’s shoulder as he is now practically laying over him. Underneath him, the cleric gives a bitter chuckle but doesn’t disagree or argue with him. They are both quiet for a long moment, when Zolf shuffles a little.

“Come and sleep here. The bed is big enough for both of us and you’re going to break your back sleeping in that chair.” He speaks gruffly, sharply, as though trying to hide the innate kindness he is displaying. Hamid smiles and shuffles over to settle beside Zolf.

He hasn’t let go of his hand.

“Thank you, Zolf. Get some rest now. Things will look better in the morning.”

The cleric just grunts in response before settling back down but Hamid knows that he appreciates his presence. He would have thrown the halfling out long before now if he actually cared about it.

Hamid closes his own eyes and curls himself around Zolf, face pressed into his shoulder.

And slowly, surely, Hamid and Zolf manage to fall asleep, with the hope that things will get easier.

**Author's Note:**

> Come bother me at twitter and tumblr, HistoriaGloria!


End file.
